She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
