I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
