I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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