you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
You took a bar mat shot.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
