My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I'm too high and old for this...
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
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