Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
