who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Randomize
