someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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