I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
