I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize