Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
