Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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