Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Randomize
