What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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