As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
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