sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
