pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
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