Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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