youre lurking in front of me
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize
