make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
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