Christians are straight up FREAKS
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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