covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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