remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
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We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
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Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.