but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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