Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
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He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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