Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
it was like eating out sand paper
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
BRING THE BAGELS
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
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