The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Found the puke drawer
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
