It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize