That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
