i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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