Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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