Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
