i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Your penis caused this!
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
