I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Randomize
