Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Randomize
