You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
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