I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize