I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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