Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Randomize
