Having a random hookup so left but love u
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize