That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
