So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
