Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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