No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
should my penis look like a turkey
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Randomize
