cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
My feet surprised me
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