His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
