he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
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Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
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Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
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