the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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