direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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