Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
