went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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